I’ve learned so much raising boys. Truth be told I was a little nervous when I found out my first baby was going to be a boy.
Growing up I didn’t have brothers, so I was prepared for a little girl.
Now, a mom of 2 boys, I can say for 100% certainty that being a boy mom is the BEST! 😍
As it turns out raising boys is a lot different than I thought it would be.
How do I raise my son to be a good man?
Your son will no doubt grow up to be a good man with your guidance as a parent.
Boys are capable of so much and it’s our duty as moms to teach them to be respectful children that grow into respectful men, husbands, and fathers.
Here are more than 5 things you should know to help you raise a GOOD boy!
- Boys Need Quality One on One Time 👪
Mother-Son dates, father-son dates, and family bonding time will always be important for your son.
Make sure they are learning the importance of family and getting one on one time to communicate with you. They need that time and family communication. - It’s Okay to Show Emotion 😢
Boys should know that it’s okay to show and express emotion. It’s OKAY to cry.
This article in Psychology Today discusses the double standard in our society for men and women expressing emotion. Often times boys are taught that it’s weak to show any outward type of emotions growing up.
But, if we don’t give our boys that outlet then how will they express their feelings as adults? How will they communicate with their spouse? …and How will they support their spouse and others when they show emotions? - Be their Biggest Cheerleader 👯
Support your son in whatever it is that they’re into and don’t push them into things they don’t like.
Not all boys love to play sports or will pick up after the talents and hobbies of their parents.
While it’s perfectly fine to share our passions with our kids, we should also encourage them in their hobbies.
All three of our kids have shown interests in different things as they’ve grown. Through our oldest son we’ve become familiar with chess tournaments, Pokemon, and manga books.
Same goes for raising girls. Our daughter turned me into a full time dance mom. Something I never expected to be, but I’ve grown to love through her love of dancing. - Hugs are Okay Even After They Grow
When your baby is born they emphasize the benefits of skin to skin contact. The Le Leche League states that skin to skin contact is important in the development of the bond between you and your baby.
But, physical affection is important through your child’s whole life. Hugging our boys, holding their hand as long as they’ll let us, and snuggling up for a family movie night is important.
Just as there is a stigma against boys showing emotion, some tend to shy away from showing their boys physical affection after a certain age.
Your son will never be too old for a hug.
Researchers from the University of Notre Dame found that any affection, including physical affection towards our kids helps them to grow into happy, compassionate adults. - Tween Angst is Real
No matter your boy’s personality, when they hit puberty and those tween years, you can be prepared for change.
Your son may eat more, sleep more, and might be just a little more irritable than usual.
Keep loving them and definitely keep hugging them! - Not all Boys are Wild Animals
All boys come with different hobbies and personalities. Some will like playing with bugs and others would prefer quiet time indoors.
You definitely can’t put boys in the same box. And even the ones who are the definition of “wild animals” can be loving, entertaining, and a joy to parent.
Enjoy Being a Boy Mom
Hold your boys close as they grow, love them, parent them with love and positivity. Keep hugging them and showing them what it is to show emotion, compassion, and empathy.
Build a strong parent-child relationship with your boys, so they know they can come to you with any problem now or in the future. Enjoy every minute of being a boy mom while they’re young and watch the incredible men they grow up to be!
Do you have a boy? How do you teach them love, compassion, and kindness? I’d love to hear about it in the comments below!
Abbie
I love you article, l have two boys and they are 3years apart,l find myself overwhelmed most times as usually it’s basically me raising them,their father isn’t that guy who likes talking
Sammy
Hi Abbie! So happy you found it helpful. I totally can relate with the feeling overwhelmed. My littles are 3 and 6 right now and they have a love/hate relationship. I’ve learned just to take things day by day. ;)
Emelia
Thanks for the good advice given here .
I however find it difficult to see how telling a boy not to cry results in him not be emotional later in life. Im saying this because some parents say this to the boy child who cries about everything instead of talking through his issues. Is there some data on this assertion? Please share.
Thank you
Sammy
Hi Emelia!
I’m not really sure I understand your question. It is my belief that teaching boys it’s okay to cry normalizes emotions for them and makes it easier for them to talk about mental health issues and feelings as an adult. I think this can be done in conjunction with talking through feelings, but it’s definitely okay for them to cry about them. Here is a great resource about the harmful effects of teaching boys not to cry. https://www.apa.org/pi/about/newsletter/2016/10/redefining-masculinity
rocky
a mother of 3 boys, excited to read message from them and their i love yous are the best feeling in the world
Sammy
My boys give me so much love, it really is the best!
Josie
I listen with active ears. I always follow through no matter how small the task is I’ve promised my son. This helps to reinforce honesty, mine and his. Respect. I respect his time and space. He can always talk with me even if he has to wake me up. Hugs! Hugs! Hugs! Laughter, tears and hugs.
I’m a thankful and grateful mom of a 15 year old boy 😁
Sammy
Hi Josie,
I love this! Follow through is so important… and we should always hug and love on our boys. Being a mom of boys is the best!
Sammy