What is it like having kids so far apart in age?
Believe it or not this is a question I am asked a lot. My kids are 7 years apart in age. My son is currently 8 and my daughter is 1. Friends, family, and even strangers have asked or commented about the age gap of my kids, so I thought I would talk about it more here today.
Pros and Cons of a Seven Year Age Gap
I’m sure there are many reasons that families have children that are far apart in age. Let me start off by saying this wasn’t something that we had planned. I had actually wanted to have children closer in age, but because of infertility issues I wasn’t able to have my daughter as soon as I had wanted.
Having children 7 years apart in age turned out to be quite a beautiful thing. Something that in my eyes has way more pros than cons.
To be honest having a child this far apart in age kind of made me nervous at first. I felt like there was some sort of unspoken expectation that you have all your kids in a certain time period. I had friends who had already had 3-4 babies and felt like the time for me was out, but boy was I wrong.
For those of you that are wondering if the age gap between your kids will be too big or just curious, I just wanted to share a little piece of what my life is like with the 7 year age gap.
Pros of a Seven Year Age Gap
- Love is all that Matters- My kids LOVE each other so much, true sibling love. They have such a special bond that really started from day one. Jonas, the older brother, is always concerned for his sister. When she is sick or gets hurt he is usually the first one to spring into action. Juliana, little sister, loves going to pick her brother up from school and cries tears when he leaves. No matter what the age gap is, if there is love there that is really all that matters!
- A Helping Hand- Having an older sibling around has it’s benefits when you have a baby or toddler. I can’t imagine what it would be like having two children under two years old, that’s for sure. My older son is such a help to me. I by no means depend on him for anything. But, he loves to help out with his sister. Especially when she was a newborn it was nice having an extra little helper to grab a diaper and keep me company at newborn doctors check-ups.
- Finding Similarities- It’s so interesting that despite a large age gap siblings can still find things in common. Even though they are 7 years apart both my kids have so many similarities. This week they bonded over their love of Moana. They both ask to watch the movie daily and sing the songs together out loud, so cute! I can’t wait to see their bond grow through similarities and differences as they get older.
- A Protector- With a much older child, we definitely have another protector over our sweet little girl. Her brother is very protective when it comes to holding hands when crossing the street and cousins that don’t like to share. Coming to her defense at every turn. I’m sure that sense of protectiveness will stay as they grow.
- Valuable Lessons– Your little one will definitely be learning much more quickly with an older and wiser sibling around. Our toddler Juliana has picked up speech very fast. She learns a lot from watching and copying her older brother. Likewise she teaches him about patience and empathy, very important lessons!
- Devoted Time- Having my children so far apart in age has definitely let me have more one on one devoted time with each of them. My toddler gets all of my attention while her brother is at school. Likewise her brother gets time with his parents at night after she is in bed. We will stay up with him to read or have a family game/movie night!
- Sacrifices- The biggest con about having kids at a large age gap to me is sacrifices. Of course, we all make sacrifices for the ones we love. However, I can’t help but feel bad about some of the sacrifices my older son has to make for Juliana, his little sister. One of those sacrifices is building LEGO’s, it may sound silly, but he absolutely can’t build LEGO’s in a main living area of our home. His sister will find a way to get them, no matter how high, and either put them in her mouth or destroy his creation.
- The Unexpected- I don’t see this happening, we are a pretty close family. But, I guess one fear is that my children will grow apart later in life because their age is so far apart. My daughter will still be in elementary school by the time my son is 18 years old, something I don’t even want to think about right now.
If you are hesitant about a large age gap because of naysayers or doubts, take comfort! Having children 7 years apart has been a wonderful, beautiful journey for me so far.
I love that I can watch them grow and learn together. The things they teach each and me about love and patience is something that can’t be replaced. No, I wouldn’t change my mind about having kids 7 years apart for any naysayer in the world.
I’m not done having kids just yet, who knows if my next one will be some time from now or sooner. I do know that whatever the age difference there is plenty to look forward to.
Do you have children with a large age gap? What has your experience been?
What worries do you have about having children far apart in age? I would love to hear from you in the comments below!
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It’s interesting seeing people here say that they have a great relationship with their 10+ year gap sibling when I’ve always observed and experienced the opposite. My brother (11 year gap) and I are practically strangers. We never really bonded. We never had anything in common. Even though we now have a lot in common as adults, he never bothers to talk to me. He just isn’t interested in being my brother, sadly. I never played with him because he was bratty and demanding. I was still too immature to have patience with him. Anyways I keep hearing that the 6-7 year gap works like a charm, so you should be fine.
Hi Lily! I’m sure there are different experiences and I’m sorry to hear it didn’t work out with your brother. I too have some family members that are difficult to communicate with. However, I think that may be reflective of things they have to work through. Hopefully he will mature in the future so you can have that family relationship.
Thanks very much for sharing extensively your experience with your widely-spaced children. I’ve got two with six years in between. Just like you, I didn’t have a master plan at the start and by the time we were set for a second, it just didn’t happen out so we had to patiently wait for about three years.
Yes, I do get the weird questions about whether it was a choice or we had difficulty conceiving. The uncalled for comments about the children being unable to play together. They DO play together, everyday. While I understand why these come up, I think people somehow ought to realise that not everyone’s life, or in this case, family design would fit into the “societal norm.” I’ve spent a long time wondering why parents who’ve got a seemingly wide gap between their children struggle with the thoughts of their being part of each other’s lives. Of course they will. They’ll always, always have each other no matter what. They’re first individuals, then siblings.
I am the second of four girls. Growing up, my parents decided to go their separate ways at some point and painfully split up the kids too. Two on each side. While there wasn’t a wide age gap between each child, we were physically and emotionally separated for many years! By the time we reunited, all we did was cry. We barely knew each other. Before we knew it, we’d all grown into adults, chosen very different career paths and generally charted our individual courses in life. I chose to use this as an example because I feel someone out there needs to be heavily encouraged that it’s okay to have children spaced out as long as they have all the love from their parents. Shower them with love and let them see how special their brother or sister is. They mustn’t do everything together, attend school together to feel that love, must they? Having them close in age is cool, but if it doesn’t happen that way, would you rather go through life worrying/regretting rather than simply enjoying the uniqueness of each child’s presence?
I really did enjoy spending loads of time with my daughter (the first) while she was a toddler and still do now that she’s seven. I enjoy being an integral part of her life and I love that our home is open to other families too. She spends loads of time amongst kids her age when we organise play dates. That’s something parents can seriously consider. Do it together with other families haha. My son is almost two and I’ve loved how that we’ve been able to invest so much time and attention in him as well. I’d insert another example here. I grew up with the constant pressure of being expected to fit into my elder sister’s shoes. She’s only a year older than me. My mum would inadvertently expect me to be like her in many, no, every way, receive her used and mostly tired clothes and shoes, toys and even her car. I hardly got any new stuff of my own until I was old enough to save up money and actually buy for myself. It was a little difficult identifying who I really was outside of my elder sister’s shadow. No mistake, I love her so very much but these were the realities I had.
Summarily, every child, every family is unique. I believe we raise our unique children to grow up to be independent of us someday. They will also be independent of their siblings, as they choose their spouses and carve out lives for themselves but they will always, always have those siblings no matter how much older or younger they are. Dear parents, please enjoy the ride. Don’t waste any time nurturing the shoulda woulda coulda feelings. Perhaps the decision was or wasn’t really yours to make. It’s okay. Some children have no siblings at all, and shouldn’t be made to feel disadvantaged in my opinion. We can always encourage friendships with other children within their age brackets. They even learn to be more accommodating and tolerant of other people outside of their families. 🙂
Great perspective. So glad to hear you were able to reunite with your siblings. It is kind of strange to me the judgement about large age gaps in children. It shouldn’t be an issue in my opinion. You’re so right about people having only children and mixed families with step children. Every family is different and beautiful in their own way. My 13 year old son loves to play with his 3 and 6 year old siblings. It helps him enjoy his childhood longer and is so special to watch.
I’m 9 months pregnant with my second child, and our son is almost 7. Like you, I never planned for a gap like this, but it took us years to get pregnant again. My son has asked for years for a little brother and he is so excited, but I’m feeling so many mixed emotions.
Thank you for sharing all of this. I sobbed through reading it, but I really needed the reminder that it’s going to be great and they will love each other.
Hi Lindsay! So happy this helped you. I can remember my 7 year old boy being so sad that he wanted a brother or sister and I just couldn’t get pregnant. It finally happened and he and his sister have the sweetest relationship. He just turned 13 (she’s 6) and they still love each other to pieces. He taught her how to play Fortnite during the pandemic and now she’s just as good as him. It’s neat to see the common interests they can find with such a large age gap. –Sammy
I have a 10 year age gap with my one brother and another 10 year age gap with my next brother (total 20 years between me and the oldest so you can see my mom started early and ended late. Lol). I can honestly say it was the best thing ever. Especially with my one brother who is 10 years older than me. He was my protector, my confidant, my caretaker, and I looked up to him slot. Still do. I never had to fight over ‘toys’ because he was already out of playing with them. I never thought about us being in different schools either. We grew up having to be independent and the teachers that might have had him for a student already forgot about him so there was no comparisons (I was a better behaved student then him. Lol). The only draw back is that it is a generational difference at times so we may have had different opinions based on what was important to us at the time. Also, I didn’t get to know my older brother growing up as much because he was serving in the military. But we formed a bond later on in life and when he had kids. Coincidentally I was about 10 years older than his first and I got my hand at being my nephew’s everything.
Hi Melissa! Love this insight! So excited to see how my kids relationships grow as they go into adulthood. At the time of this comment they are 12, 5, and 3. It is really cool to see my little ones big brother set a good example for them and play with him. I feel like it allows him to be a kid.
I’m currently up at 2am googling “7 year age gap” & come across your article. My girls are 6.5 years apart & every so often, I get sad about their age gap and question how close they will be in the future. I’m currently pregnant with our 3rd girl and this concern about my first two age difference just will not leave me alone. I find myself feeling guilty that my youngest two will be so close in age (2 years apart) but I wasn’t able to provide a sibling that was closer in age for my oldest. It sounds so silly & I blame it on the hormones but I’ve cried about it :’( Your words helped a bit so thank you.
I can totally relate to pregnancy and post-pregnancy hormones. I have cried over the silliest things. I’ve been through postpartum depression twice, which left me with guilt and anxiety.
At the time of this comment I have a 2 YO Boy, 5 YO Girl, and 12 YO boy. They may not always get along, but they are for the most part, great friends. My son loves that he is the older brother and can show them the ropes. He loves teaching them things and re-experiencing his childhood playing silly games and singing silly songs with them. The little ones idolize him and love following him everywhere, snuggling up with him to watch cartoons, and sticking with him on family hikes.
There are times when they get on his nerves, but I think that’s just normal sibling life. Sometimes the little ones aren’t getting along and one or the other wants to hang out with their older brother.
I’m sure your 3 will have special magical moments together like this too! Glad this post was able to help! Good luck with your pregnancy.
Hi everyone I have 2 monsters and u won’t be able to judge the gap !!!! My elder son turned 13 on 13th May and younger one turned 4 on 21st May 2020.Actually to be honest Initially I never wanted a second baby as all members in my family were working and I was all day drained out both physically and mentally handling my hyper active boy!! Moreover I became mom at very early age so I was weak always tired but slowly I realised that not having siblings does not give a complete upbringing on any child psychologically. That year I lost my Grandma and was surprised to see the impact and the trauma of losing parents and siblings coming to help each other. They are just extended genes right?? So due to both these things I decided to have sibling for my boy!! But destiny has something else planned for me. It took me 2-3 years, so many tests ultrasound and a Laproscopic surgery to have my second boy but believe me enjoying motherhood at this age is so satisfying u really feel that these are priceless moments!!
I can relate to a lot of what your saying. Having little resources is very challenging when you have a child. We also have little resources as far as family who could watch our kids, which makes date night challenging. Bless you for all it took to have your second baby. I too really struggled with infertility, but luckily it was solved with medication. So sorry to hear of the loss of your grandma. Hope all is well now.
Great post of pros and cons. It helps me understand what we might be facing. We have tried for 4 years to get pregnant again and finally went through fertility treatments. Our son was a surprise baby and will be turning 8 a month after baby boy #2 is born this fall. I was concerned about the age gap, but reading this post and the comments of others has helped. I am an only child and my husband had a brother two years younger so we don’t have much experience with such an age gap.
So happy this post has helped you. Our experience with a large age gap has been so positive!
My oldest son is 21, my daughter is 19. A few years later I had their brother who is now 14. He is so extremely loved by his two older siblings. My daughter is away at college and she FaceTimes with him every night to check up on him. For my 40th birthday I got a HUGE surprise and now have a one year old son. My 3 older kids are over the moon in love with him. My daughter was at my side during labor helping me bring her brother into this world. It’s been AMAZING ❤️
Hi – I was glad to find this Information however I was looking for something to help with having 2 first-born sons. My boys are 7-1/2 years apart. According to birth-order book, 5 years between kids makes another first-born. My sons do not get along at all. They each want to be in charge. Younger son was a surprise and we got older involved as much as possible. However, younger needed 5 days at Childrens hospital so I’m sure I didn’t do a great job giving older attention due to fears with newborn. There is great jealousy by the older son. We try to tell him that everything we do for younger we did with him. They are 13 and 5 and I struggle with reprimanding them when they argue. My husband is calmer and trys to avoid conflict. I literally tell the younger to ignore his older brother (who is an instigator). Our home is less than peaceful and we’ve had the oldest in some form of therapy for over a year now. I’m looking for help with this daily battle. The only peace is when older brother is out at activity or in his room. Doesn’t make for great memories. Thanks for listening.
Hi Bonita, Sorry for the delayed reply. I just saw your comment. I’m sure your son is just going through some normal teen angst at 13 years old. Make sure he knows he is loved by offering some one on one time and then coming together as a family for family time. Try to find some things your 13 year old really enjoys that your 5 year old would also enjoy. A trip to a favorite theme park or a family friendly movie he loves. Offer positive reinforcement to both of them when they aren’t arguing. Something that would be age appropriate. You can check out my positive discipline tips here >> https://sammyapproves.com/positive-parenting-solutions-when-your-kids-wont-listen/
Remember that it’s quite possible that your older son is going through a phase. Be patient and know that their relationship might very well change for the better with time. Good luck to you and your family!
Hey, sorry to hear that things have been tough for you! It sounds like you’ve had a lot of challenges that have made parenting pretty stressful. I hope it gets easier for you. You need support and people you can talk to for help sometimes so I hope you have people like that around you. I have 2 kids close in age and am considering a third child. Hearing your struggles touched my heart. Sending you my love and prayers ♥️ I’m sure your boys know you love them and may even turn out to be very close in years to come! Look after yourself, Kathryn.
I googled this topic and came across this. The reason I googled is because I am struggling with my childrens’ age gaps. My son is 13, my other son is 6 and my daughter is 2 1/2. Homelife is fine. Things do get a little hectic when I’m going to JR high basketball practice at 6:30 am, then taking my six year old to school at 7:45, having to wake up my toddler and run her around in the car… Basketball games in the evening, kindergarten parties and reading and homework, after school activities, etc. And, it’s worth mentioning that my daughter is so much more difficult than my boys ever were. Family vacations or outings are a disaster. It’s very difficult to find amusement we can all enjoy. Everyone is in a different stage. My eldest son and I love rollercoasters and amusement parks. It is impossible for us to go as a family because we cant ride the rides together. We stopped going to the movies because my 2 year old wont sit through a movie and by the end of the previews (and commericals… what?!), I have to take her out of the theater. it seems no matter where we go or what I do, the baby gets tired, then the 6 year old gets tired and my eldest ends up having to wait around most of the day and I’m left exhausted. Every trip we have taken the past few years has been little to no fun at all. Perhaps my situation is exasperated by the fact I have no access to child care. I cant leave my daughter with someone to take my other 2 to do something. So, honestly, I completely regret the age gap. But of course I wouldnt trade my life for the world. My children all love each other very much. Just giving an honest perspective based on my experience.
Hi Audrey, I’m so happy you left this comment. First, let me tell you that I can completely relate to what you’re saying.
I have a now 3 year old girl with the most spit fire personality I’ve ever encountered, an 11 month old boy, and a 10 year old. Balancing chess club, engineering club, homeschooling, working from home, homemaking, and these 3 kiddos can definitely become overwhelming.
We had to let a lot of things go with our daughter for a while like movies and road trips where the babies aren’t happy in the car for a long time.
But, something that has helped me is looking at the beauty of the kids growing up and their love for each other. Knowing that there is a time and a season for everything and things do change and get better.
Sometimes with little ones our priorities shift and change. But, things do even out and get better. Just last week we took all the kids to the movies for the first time in over a year. For the first time in forever our 3 year old sat through the whole movie with no tears or fits and the baby was happy breastfeeding.
Vacations are also getting easier as our daughter who used to scream the whole way is getting older and now sleeps the whole way. Our baby is much more mellow, must be boys. ;)
Just give it time and patience. Let yourself know that it is only temporary and that it will get better and easier. It is also perfectly normal and OKAY to be frustrated, stressed, and overwhelmed at times.
Good luck mama, you’ve got this!!
I can’t tell you enough how much I needed to hear this. I have a 4 year old and we want more kids, but I am trying to finish my career/educational goals first. We keep hitting obstacles that are pushing them farther and farther off and at this rate, I expect roughly a 7 year age gap. Thank you for making this sound normal, rather than the negative tone that seems to resonate with society. I feel guilty for not having kids closer together, but I feel like I get to enjoy more of each age and spend really dedicated time with my son.
Mom of One
Hi Melissa, I’m so happy it helped! We just had baby #3 this past January, who is 10 years younger than our oldest. All of our kids LOVE each other so much. Definitely leave the negativity at the door. Age gap really is a non-issue.
Lovely post. I have a 2 and soon to be 9 year old. And yes I’ve had similar experiences.
The thing I like the most about the age gap as a parent is that I’ve been able to have such a close relationship with both my children. We can do things that suit each child at their age. I can take my daughter (the eldest) to watch a show whilst my son (the youngest) is happy with a day in the park.
However they do live doing things together like going through the fair or playing with play doh.
They are individual and independent but best of friends too. Don’t get me wrong, they fight too, but my boy loves having a big sister to play fight, and she loves that she has the upper hand.
It wasn’t what we planned but I feel it was planned for us and wouldn’t have it any other way.
Good luck everyone xx
My Boys are 7 years apart I had no problem they got alone well, as if they were a year apart , the Oldest would helped his youngest brother ,and he also helped me, we would do activity together just the 3 of us ,yes I’m a single Mother and were 27 with my 1st and 34 with the 2cd son!
I googled this topic because I currently have a 5 year old and I literally have not felt the urge to have another child until recently. Maybe it’s because my son just started kindergarten, I’ve realized time is moving so very fast. My husband and I just had a conversation about this and he would like another child as well but wants to wait at least a year, as he has some goals he is trying to reach career wise and so do I. I don’t know if I’m robbing my son of a strong sibling bond and it makes me feel guilty. Reading that your boys get along great gives me hope. I will probably have about the same age gap. Had my first at 27 as well.
Hi Joy! I have had the best experience with having a big age gap. Since writing this post my kids are now ages 1 (boy), 4 (girl), and 11 (boy). The two littlest have the sweetest bond with their older brother. He truly is their protector and loves playing with them. He is older and loves seeing them reach their milestones and helping them learn. As a mom it’s so cool being able to have already been through the experience with my oldest and repeat it with my littles. It makes it so much more special. I know how fast they grow because my oldest got big sooo fast. So, I feel like I cherish the time I have with my littles even more! I could go on and on. But, I definitely don’t think age gap, if you want to have more kids, should be an issue. Best of luck to you on your journey! —Sammy
All these comments sound great, although I wish I could say the same for my household. My wife had two older kids when I met her, by the age of 22 I was the parent to a nine year old and a five year old. I raised both of those kids as if they were my own, I gave them everything I had and our relationship has always been pretty good for the most part. As the years went on me and my wife finally had a child together, we had an amazing boy together, me and my son are basically joined at the hip! My son is now eight he has a sibling which is 12 and eight years older than him. His much older sister has a great relationship with him, although I cannot say the same when it comes to his older sixteen year old brother.
His brother is very standoffish, does not give any affection, and barely communicates with his brother. It makes me sad, I see that my son looks up to his older brother but I cannot feel the love is returned. I have given everything to his older brother, perhaps I wish I had more time to dedicate towards him but it seems that he is pretty happy with all of his gadgets and his car which I have given him.
I think the age gap between the two has been an issue in this interesting dynamic of family which we have, coupled along with my parenting which I am sure could use some improvement. Things are not going as plan and I wish it could be different, I am not sure what can fix this dilemma.
Thanks for listening everyone, I guess I also just needed a place to vent. This was a great blog and thanks for the info.
Hi Alberto! I’m so happy you were able to vent your frustration here. It sounds like your son is being a normal teen. My sister and I fought like cats and dogs when I was in high school, even though we were best of friends before. Now we are back to being friends again. I’m sure he will show increased love once he is out of this stage. Best of luck to you and your growing family!
My brother and I are 8 years apart and we really weren’t raised together. We see each other about once a year because we live 7 hours apart. BUT I have a lot of great memories with him and when we do get together it is really nice. I feel very close to him and I know he’s there for me. His personality is not touchy-feely though. To the outside world we may not seem close, but to me we are. My son is 8 and I am just now trying for another. The age Gap doesn’t mean a thing if you teach your children the value of family.
My little sister and I are 7 years apart and honestly I wish we were closer in age. I was 13 when she was 6 and I was going to college when she entered middle school, as she gets older we get a bit closer. I’m now 24 and she is 17 and I’m working on getting closer to her now, but it took a while to get to this point.
I just read your post and I’m undecided to whether have another child. I have a 9 year old daughter and a 6 year old son. I always wanted to have 3 kids and so does my husband. I postponed having another child because I enrolled to college and thought I was going to wait 2 years and then have another one. But that was not the case.It has taken me a while to graduate and I will be graduating next year. My husband wants another one and wants me to be pregnant by summer and by that time I be done with college.But I’m still not sure if that is a good idea. My brother and I are 8 years apart and we are not that close. I don’t want the same with my kids.😐
Loved this article – thanks for sharing your story. My kids are 7 yrs apart as well (also an older boy and younger girl) and I’ve noticed a lot of the same things you’ve included in here. And yeah, the comments I get from strangers and some family members are ridiculous. So glad to hear I’m not alone in this frustration!
All the best, Gretel
As the middle child I grew up with an older sister, 3 years age difference and then a brother 7 years younger. When I was younger I loved my brother but was obviously a bit of a brat to him at times. (Typical siblings). We got along pretty well growing up, now he’s about to turn 18 and we have been practically best friends for years now. Even with the age gap we are almost like twins, same personality, humor, interests. I wouldn’t worry about them drifting apart with age, my brother and I have gotten closer as the years pass.
Hope this helps some as well.
We have twins (boy and girl) who will be 8 about a month after our surprise baby will be born. We we thought we were done and this surprise happened and we decided to go with it. I’m worrying about the same type of issues that have come up here, and with twins i don’t know how they will be , hopefully all will be positive in the end!
Hi Doug, Good luck on the birth of your new baby. I’m sure your twins will love him/her!
Thank you for the post
My older daughter is 7 and younger daughter is of 15 days today, they will love with other like anything forever…thank you thank you!!!
Hi Rahul, I’m so happy to hear about the birth of your daughter. I’m sure they will have a close relationship that lasts! Thank you for stopping by!
Thank you for this post! I am seeing a dr now to help me with infertility. My son is almost 5 and if all goes well I will be fertile in the next 4 months. There may be a big age gap but luckily my husband and his brother are 8 years apart and they are best friends. My husband is 35 and his brother is 27. So it makes me happy to see that. Either way, I will be happy with one or two or three. They are all blessings. Infertility has been rough but I am making progress. Thanks for this post!
It’s really good to hear someone say that they enjoy that there kids have a larger age Gap. I have two kids at the moment almost 11 and 6 and we are contemplating having a 3rd and that age Gap would be about 7 years. I loved the age Gap between my two but always thought that it would be too chit of a gap to have another one. I love your pros and cons list, I have the same kind of list trying to decide if we should have another or not!
Thanks for your post. I have two daughters, a 7 year old and a three week old. They are 7 years and 2 days apart. They actually had the same due date. After years struggling with infertility for five years, and thinking more biological kids were not in the cards for us we got pregnant. Thank you Sammy for your post. It has helped me see all the benefits of a large age gap. Congrats on your pregnancy! When are you due?
Thank you Cristy!! Infertility is the worst, but seeing the beautiful relationship between my now 9 year old and 2 year old make it all worth it. They absolutely love each other. We are so excited about our next baby, a boy! He is due at the end of January. :)
Hey everyone, I have a little brother that is 7 years younger than I. Am now 32 and my brother and I have always been very close with each other from the very beginning. Yes we are in different stages in life, am married and have a child, he is not. But to this day he comes to me for advice and comfort for anything. I feel that the age difference can be a wonderful thing, at least it has been for my brother and I. You will see as they age the bond will only get stronger.
Hi Bonnie! Thanks so much for sharing. It is so heartwarming to hear your experience. I hope my two little ones continue to have that close relationship as they grow older.
Great post!! I’m just wondering how do you spend your weekends? Since kids are at different stages it’s hard to find a place that will cater to both their liking.
@Bonnie, growing up did you feel you were missing out because of compromises you had to do for your brother?
I now have a 6 yrs old girl and husband and I cant make up our mind on second child or we’re done! We love our tight relationship and family games nights yet we feel bad about our daughter missing out on sibling bond. We have a very strong relationship now and we have love for frequent traveling and adding a child soon will definitely change our lifestyle for a few years. We also appreciate a more quite home 😅 and at the age of 37 we both thinking adding a child now will push retirement later.
Wondering if anyone had similar thoughts and what’s your experience?
Hi Angie, We haven’t had any problems having family fun on the weekends. It’s all about finding something everyone will enjoy. For example, right now during the quarantine we decided to get a quality trampoline rather than a play ground. Our 12 year old can enjoy the trampoline and our 2 and 5 year old love it too!
Normally all the kids, young and old, love going to the park, going to the zoo, going on family walks and hikes together. Our older son loves sharing his love of Pokemon and other things with his younger brother and sister. It’s like he gets to re-live his younger childhood years with them. It’s really cool and special to watch!
I think many families are having children later in life now. It’s all a personal preference, but I think if you have the energy and want to grow your family more than go for it!
Thank you for this! When my son is born this year my daughter will be 7. I also struggled with infertility. Life doesn’t always work the way you want it to but it usually works out for the best :)
I’m excited to share this experience with my daughter and can’t wait to watch them to grow up together!
Hi Amy! So happy you stopped by. You really never know what will happen. It took me over 4 years to get pregnant with my daughter and then out of the blue this year I found out I was pregnant with baby #3, without any infertility assistance.
Now I get to experience having two little ones that are 2 years apart! Good luck with your pregnancy! Seeing them bond despite a big age gap is such an amazing experience.
Hey! Great post. I just have one who is 10, but she will be 11 by the time our second is due. I also had infertility issues, and I was convinced that I would probably not have anymore kids. However, here I am. I’m excited and scared, but the pros and cons you shared have also run through my head. I’m looking forward to what the future will bring, and I can’t wait to see how the kids will interact with each other!
Hi Amy! Congrats on your pregnancy! I think you’ll be pleasantly surprised by the age gap. It is really neat to see the bond they develop. :)
I am pregnant with my second child, my first will be 7 by the time this one is born.
Thank you for your post, it helps me look forward to the future
Congrats Rachael! I am so happy that this was helpful to you. I’m sure you will be surprised by the bond your kids have even though they are so far apart in age. :)
My oldest and youngest are also 7 years apart. Your list of pros and cons speak truth to exactly how my heart feels. It really is a beautiful thing to see the sibling love and admiration.
Hi Angela! I’m so happy you could relate. The age difference of siblings really doesn’t matter as much as one would think.
Thanks for this post. My husband and I are going through this pros and con list right now. This was very helpful!
I’m so happy to hear this helped you. Thanks for stopping by. :)
Such a lovely perspective.. You write with all your heart..