As a mom of three, I often wonder how to balance daily tasks with taking care of my kids and keeping myself happy. I used to wake up, grab my phone, and scroll through notifications, feeling overwhelmed before my kids even got up.
But, then I started waking up at 6 AM to prepare for the day.
Being a better mom is all about making small changes, like exercising and getting dressed before the kids wake up. These simple changes can make your mornings more refreshing.
Having a clear plan with a to-do list and trying to do a few of those things each day helps me relax and sets a positive tone for the day.
These 27 tips aim to help you improve your motherhood journey, whether it’s during breakfast or dealing with a toddler tantrum.
What does it mean to be a better mom?
Being a better mom means embracing both the good and the hard parts of motherhood. Remember that parenting is full of both sacrifices and having a deep love for your kids.
Every mom has is travelling their own path, filled with sleepless nights, teaching hard lessons, and the bittersweet feeling of watching your little ones grow.
Activities like snuggling on the couch, braiding hair, or watching movies together show how important it is to spend quality time with our kids. These moments help build strong bonds and create memories that last.
I remember these small moments with my mom, who was raising us as a single mother. The fact that she took the time to do these things showed me the love she had for my sister and I.
Motherhood isn’t about being perfect though. It’s a journey of growth, adapting, and supporting your kids in the best way you can.
It’s good to reframe the hard times when you can, so your day with your kids will be more positive. Here are some things to think about:
| Emotions | Challenges Faced | Reframe it |
|---|---|---|
| Tired, exhaustion | Sleepless nights with little ones | I got to snuggle on the couch with them. My baby/kids love me so much. |
| Stress/Anxiety | Teaching difficult lessons / Behavior problems | My kids are so happy when we watch a movie together. |
| Overwhelm | Constant appointments, school meetings, work | Braiding my daughters hair was so fun and it made her happy. |
In trying to be a better mom, I accept the reality of what we are going through. It’s tied to our emotions, things going on in our lives, and what we need to get done.
You must keep learning and growing, while helping your children and yourself be more happy and positive along the way.
The Importance of Routines
Having routines not only improves your mental health as a mom, it’s good for kids too. Your routine doesn’t need to be perfect, but it helps to know what to generally expect each day.
Waking Up Before the Kids
Getting up before your kids do gives you that “me time” that all moms need. I like to use this time to catch up on my favorite shows, get work done, and plan out the day.
Establishing a Positive Morning Mindset
Start your day out with a positive mindset by journaling, writing down positive affirmations, listening to a positive podcast, or putting on some uplifting music.
You can also tell your kids positive affirmations to help their day start out well!
Effective Communication with Your Kids
Family communication is key to a strong bond with your kids. Talking openly during a family meeting or one on one can help you connect deeply.
It makes them feel heard and understood. By listening well and encouraging them to talk, they can share their thoughts freely.
How to Practice Active Listening
Active listening means more than just hearing your kids out. You should focus on fully engaging with what they say and feel.
Here’s how you can improve listening:
- Be present: Turn off distractions to focus on your child.
- Reflect their feelings: Show you understand by repeating back what they said.
- Ask open-ended questions: These questions lead to deeper talks and help your child open up.
Encouraging Open Dialogues
Help your kids feel safe enough to talk to you about anything. Studies show kids do well in life when they talk openly and feel understood.
Being approachable and listening shows them you care. Here’s how you can do it:
- Involve them in decision-making: Asking for their opinions makes them feel important.
- Encourage questions: Letting them ask lots of questions shows you are there to answer them.
- Praise them for sharing: Praising them for sharing things with you, especially difficult things like a bully at school, will make them want to come to you for anything.
Implementing Calm Parenting Techniques
Using calm parenting techniques can help you stay calm in stressful situations. A relaxed parenting style makes it easier when handling challenges with your kids.
When the going gets tough any mom can feel overwhelmed. It’s key to take care of ourselves to avoid burnout.
I make sure to get enough sleep, cut down on screen time, and do physical activities like yoga or walking. These things help me recharge.
Getting enough sleep is crucial for emotional balance, which helps your parenting.
Trying to have low expectations can also help in keeping you from getting too frustrated. It’s important to understand your kids’ limits and be okay with adjusting your plans when a toddler tantrum or unplanned mom emergency strikes.
Knowing your triggers and what makes you stressed or angry is important.
I’ve figured some things that trigger me, which has helped me find ways to deal with it when it happens. Things like deep breathing, yoga, taking short breaks, putting on music, or journaling help me stay calm.
Here’s a table summarizing some effective calm parenting techniques that have worked for me:
| Technique | Description | Benefits |
|---|---|---|
| Mindfulness Practices | Meditation or Yoga (You can do this with your kids. Cosmic Kids yoga is a favorite of ours) | Enhanced emotional regulation and improved parent-child relationships |
| Active Listening | Paying close attention to children’s words and emotions | Strengthened communication and understanding |
| Regular Physical Activity | Incorporating exercise into daily routines | Improved mental clarity and stress management |
| Establishing Sleep Routines | Creating a consistent bedtime schedule for your kids and yourself | Increased emotional stability and overall well-being |
| Taking Breaks and Me Time | Stopping before reacting in frustration and asking for help when you need it | Teaches your kids a positive way to deal with frustration and gives yourself a much needed reset |
Creating a Supportive Environment for Your Children
Make your home a safe and supportive space where your children feel like they can talk openly about their feelings.
Building an Emotionally Safe Space
Show your kids steady love and patience while showing them you are a person they can trust.
Set clear rules and limits with a positive reinforcement system and gentle consequences. Giving them consistency and positive discipline helps create a supportive home.
How to Show Encouragement and Love
Spending quality time with your kids is important. I try to have at least 10 minutes a day without distractions to talk and we also do no device dinners where we sit and talk as a family. This helps us communicate better and strengthens our family connection.
Eating together as a family teaches healthy eating and brings everyone closer. Creating special moments with each child by having mommy/son or daughter dates, or just little conversations boosts their confidence and makes them feel special.
When having these conversations with your kids make sure to listen without judgement.
Setting a Good Example
Being a mom is full of challenges and rewards. But, being a good role model is so important when raising kids.
They learn from us, so it’s important to show them the qualities you want them to have. This is true whether you are teaching your toddler to talk or helping your teenager with tough feelings.
Being a Role Model in Everyday Situations
Every day, you have a new chance to show your kids what’s important to you.
I teach my teenager how to be a good parent by showing him the positive interactions I have with his younger siblings. I show my daughter what it means to be kind by how I treat my husband.
Since they watch me closely, I make sure to live by the morals and values that are important to me.
Here are some key behaviors I focus on:
- Healthy Communication: I listen actively and let my kids speak without judging them. I do the same when speaking with my husband, friends, and other family members.
- Emotional Regulation: My kids see how I handle my feelings, teaching them about self control and how to behave when you are angry, upset, or excited.
- Respect: Being kind to everyone shows my kids the importance of respect.
- Accountability: Admitting mistakes and apologizing teaches them about humility and growing.
- Continuous Learning: I show them that learning is lifelong, whether through books or education. I am constantly taking classes, watching videos, and attending conferences to be better at my job as a blogger and my kids see that.
Of course different parents have different lessons to teach. As a single mom, my mother taught me the importance of not giving up, staying strong, and doing whatever it takes to provide for your family.
Strategies for How to Be a Better Mom When Stressed
Stress is sadly a daily occurrence in my life as a mother. I’ve had to navigate motherhood during the worst days of stress, anxiety, depression and dealing with my ADHD and OCD.
Many of us juggle multiple roles as moms, making it necessary to find ways to cope. Finding ways to manage stress can help you to be a more present and engaged mother.
Here are some effective ways to deal with stress:
Dealing with Mom Burnout
Recognizing the signs of mom burnout is the first step. 80% of mothers experience stress from overwhelming responsibilities, causing symptoms like irritability and fatigue.
Things like not getting enough sleep or drinking enough water can make these symptoms even worse.
- Prioritize self-care: Even short breaks for deep breathing or quick walks can help clear your mind.
- Healthy eating: A balanced diet boosts energy levels, and I often have to resist unhealthy snacks on days I’m feeling extra tired.
- Engage your support network: Talking to friends and family can really make a difference, with 75% of mothers benefiting from emotional support.
- Seek professional help: Having a trusted therapist or mental health professional to talk to does help. If you are feeling depressed or overwhelmed make sure to reach out for an appointment with an expert.
Finding Your Calm in the Chaos
Finding peace amid chaos can help you manage stress so you can have more quality time with your kids. Engaging in family-friendly activities such as walking or drawing can be relaxing family activities that also help grow your bond!
- Keep a sense of humor: Laughter can always lift your spirits on a hard day and having a sense of humor teaches your kids that you can still find joy in hard moments.
- Practice gratitude: Journaling is a powerful thing. Even just writing down three things I’m grateful for or three things I accomplished daily helps me feel uplifted.
- Exercise regularly: Just 30 minutes a day has been shown to lower stress levels for over 50% of moms, and spending time outside is a mood booster. My go-to is Yoga with Adriene, she has hundreds of free workouts and meditations on her YouTube channel.
Practicing Patience and Understanding
Practicing patience as a mother makes a caring space for our kids. To be patient, you need to know what your triggers are and how to stay calm during hard situations.
How to Be a More Patient Mom
Studies show that small things can make us feel frustrated. Here are ways to be more patient:
- Deep Breathing: Deep breaths calm your mind and body, helping you think before you act.
- Task Prioritization: Figuring out what’s important helps you manage your day and lowers stress.
- Acknowledging Unmet Needs: Knowing what you need helps stop frustration from showing up in your talks with kids. Are you tired or hungry?
Not taking my kids’ actions personally can change how you view things. Seeing things from their point of view helps you understand how much your reactions can affect them.
Techniques for Managing Frustration
It’s key to take a break when you feel too much overwhelm or emotion. Taking a short step back stops bad feelings from showing your words and actions.
| Technique | Description |
|---|---|
| Deep Breathing | Calms the body and mind, enhancing my ability to respond calmly. |
| Prioritizing Tasks | Helps manage my daily responsibilities, reducing feelings of being overwhelmed. |
| Stepping Back | Provides necessary space to regroup and prevent negative interactions with children. |
| Positive Consequences | Redirects children’s behavior by associating actions with appropriate outcomes. |
Reading Books on Parenting: A Path to Becoming a Better Mom
Reading parenting advice books is a great way to start on a positive parenting journey. These books give insights and techniques that help you tackle parenting challenges.
“The Wonder Weeks” is a favorite, selling over two million copies and offering a helpful app too. It taught me about my child’s early developmental leaps, easing my mom worries.
- Plooij, Xaviera (Author)
- English (Publication Language)
- 464 Pages – 09/10/2019 (Publication Date) – Countryman Press (Publisher)
“Peaceful Parent, Happy Kids” by Laura Markham is another great read. It shows how important it is to connect with your kids emotionally. This book has helped me be a better parent. “The Danish Way of Parenting” also offers positive parenting strategies that match my values.
- Markham, Dr. Laura (Author)
- English (Publication Language)
- 304 Pages – 11/28/2012 (Publication Date) – TarcherPerigee (Publisher)
- Audible Audiobook
- Jessica Joelle Alexander (Author) – Kim Mai Guest (Narrator)
- English (Publication Language)
- 08/09/2016 (Publication Date) – Penguin Audio (Publisher)
Brené Brown’s “Daring Greatly” inspires me with its focus on being real and vulnerable. This approach can help you with parenting and personal growth.
- Brené Brown (Author)
- English (Publication Language)
- 640 Pages – 06/24/2023 (Publication Date) – Vermilion/Penguin Life Ltd (Publisher)
Conclusion
The journey of becoming a better mom is something that never ends. Just like other things in life you have to always keep learning, adapting, and growing with your kids.
Just trying to create a loving space for our kids as we face motherhood’s challenges is the goal. The fact that you’re reading this article means you want to be better for your kids, which also means you are a great mom already!
By using tips like effective communication and calm parenting, you can create a deeper connection with your kids and feel rewarded as a mom.
I hope this article encourages every mom to use her strengths and ask for help when needed and to know that taking care of yourself is half the battle.
FAQ
How can I be a better mom when I’m feeling depressed?
First, take care of yourself and reach out for support from friends, family, a mental health specialist, or a therapist. Doing small, fun activities with your kids can also make you feel better. And don’t be afraid to talk about how you’re feeling with them in a way they can understand.
What are some calm parenting techniques I can use?
Try deep breathing, positive affirmations, and mindfulness to stay calm. These methods help you stay calm and teach your kids how to handle their feelings too.
How do I create a supportive emotional environment for my children?
Create a safe space by building trust and showing love and encouragement consistently. Listen to your kids and accept their feelings. Let them feel free to express themselves.
What can I do to model positive behavior for my kids?
Kids watch what you do. Show them good communication, respect, and how to manage feelings by being a good role model. Share how you handle your feelings and challenges.
How can I cope with parental burnout?
First, know the signs of burnout. Take care of yourself, rest when you need to, and connect with other moms for support. Simple things like setting aside time for yourself or practicing mindfulness can reduce stress.
What techniques can I use to be a more patient mom?
To be more patient, take a break when needed, use calming techniques, and know what makes you frustrated. Doing activities that ground you can help you stay calm when things get tough.
Are there any good books on parenting that can help me?
Yes! There are many great parenting books full of advice and new ideas. Reading can inspire you and make you feel less alone in your parenting journey.
How can I improve communication with my kids?
Listen fully to your kids when they talk. Encourage them to share by asking questions and telling them it’s okay to feel and express their feelings.
What are some keys to being a good mom?
Be present, patient, and involved with your kids. Embrace your unique parenting path. Remember, making mistakes is how we all grow, for you and your kids.
How can I not take my kids’ behavior personally?
Remember, kids act out because of their feelings and the world they see. Knowing their actions don’t reflect on you helps you stay calm and respond better.
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